One Size Does Not Fit All

If you've walked through any major retailer in the mall lately, you may have noticed the increase in "one size fits all" labels making an appearance inside the seams of many of our favorite brands. You know, the brands that typically have a celebrity ambassador, and overly sexualized print ads.

Upon first glance, that tag can cause anxiety in many people. "What if" tends to be our first thought. "What if 'one size fits all' means 'all, except me?'" 

Credit: Rachele Cateyes

These are not clothes you want to buy. 

You want to buy clothes that make you feel good about your body, whatever size you are right now. You want clothes that make you feel like the confident being that you are. Why are we still supporting brands that are trying to trick us into believing that in order to fit into their labels, we first need to change something about our appearance? Until this happens, the ads mock, we cannot possibly expect to look good in the clothes. 

These are clothes I will not buy. Or try on for that matter. 

Recently, I have started shopping small, from local designers [Esty], or thrift shops. On one shopping adventure on the gypsy junQue bus, I noticed the designer I was shopping from had all of the labels cut out of her clothes. 

Initially, I thought it was a mistake, and I was a little annoyed:

How was I supposed to know whether or not the clothes were going to fit me or not? 

Little did I know, the owner of the boutique, Elke Lockert, had intentionally cut out the size labels on all of her clothes to promote body positivity and divert our attention and preoccupations with the size of our waists and hips, and back to the craftsmanship of the clothing. 

"I've worn a size 4, and I've worn a 3XL," said Lockert. "If it fits, it fits. If it doesn't, something else will. You shouldn't have to look at a tag and think, 'I can't fit in it, because I've been programmed to think I'm a certain size." 

Credit: Pretty Pear Bride

About two weeks after this initial encounter with no labels, I was browsing a local thrift shop, and noticed there were no labels in the shirts. Rather than feeling similar irritation, I felt a sense of calm. 

I didn't feel the need to know the size, and I liked not knowing. 

I didn't have anxiety attached to a number, because it didn't matter what it was. 

If I liked the shirt, I would try it on, and if it fit, I would buy it. If it didn't, I would put it back on the rack, without giving it a second thought and avoiding the disappointment or shame which is often involved in trying on clothes when we make ourselves hyper-aware of labels.

Who cares what the label says? We are the only ones that know what it says on the inside of our jeans, or on the tag of our shirts. We are the only ones that hold the power to let that number either dictate or destroy us. Don't let it. That number does not give, or takeaway our worth.

Our character is what gives us our worth: our kindness, our heart, our sense of wonder and creativity, our sense of humor, and our loyalty to our friends and family.

This is what matters.

I Am Not My Body

"The body is imaginary, and we bow to the tyranny of a phantom. Love is a privilege perception, the most total and lucid not only of the unreality of the world but of our own unreality; not only do we traverse a realm of shadows; but ourselves are shadow."

                                                   -Adolfo Bioy Casares-

Today was one of those days where I was waging war on my body for no apparent reason other than to have someone to fight with.

I have always been conscious about my health, and really proud of the progress I've made in whatever sport I'm practicing at the time: boxing, weight lifting, resistance training, cycling, track, soccer, etc. To me, nothing is more rewarding and nothing has the ability to make me feel better than a good workout with a nice heavy sweat.

However, these last two weeks have presented a challenge for me. Between working on final assignments for school, work, and having to pack up my belongings and move within the next week, I have fallen off track so to speak.

My nutrition has amounted to grabbing a handful of whatever snack I can open quickly, and eat while walking out the door, or too stressed to eat at all. With a change of routine I haven't been able to commit as fully as I would like to my workouts.

I was feeling pretty down about it, until my philosophy professor said something that liberated all the internal feelings of guilt and doubt.

"Anything good or bad that happens to the body will not make or break us, because we are not our body. We are a soul."

The body merely serves as a vehicle to get from point A to point B. However, this statement made me realize, I am often guilty of not treating my vehicle as I should; either I refuse to put any gas in it at all, or fill it with so much gas, that it starts to spill out the sides.

If our bodies were actually vehicles, my vehicle would be long overdue to breakdown on the side of the highway, threatening to abandon me in the middle of the night, knowing I didn't have my AAA card on hand.

This short phrase brought me so much freedom that I thought I might cry the longer that I reflected on it.

My biggest pet peeve has and might always be getting complimented on my outward appearance.

It's not that I can't appreciate a compliment, because I can. But to me, it's the most superficial form of compliment you can receive. There wasn't much thought there, not much connection. Your mind merely connected with your eyes for a few brief seconds, and your mouth said the first thing that came to mind. There was no depth to the observation.

In my opinion, compliments about my looks or my physical body are superficial, because I put little to no thought into my appearance every day. Everything I do from eating healthy, going to the gym, and dressing professionally is for my mind, and for me to be able to feel and function to my best ability. But to me, there is so much more to me than just my body.

Yes, I am proud of the fact that I have strong legs, but I also have a big heart that inspires me to help anyone in my community that might need a helping hand.

Yes, I am proud of the fact, more than I should be that sometimes I brush my hair in the right direction, but I also have a powerful mind that is always running, churning, trying to crank out new ideas and topics to write about, trying to imagine new worlds to create.

I am so much more than my body, and more than I have been known to give myself credit for.

My body is capable of amazing things, but my soul is the driver that allows my body to get me there, and through all of those activities and obstacles I encounter on a day-to-day basis.

So I challenge you this: look in the mirror tonight. Stand there and really look for a few minutes until you truly see the picture staring back at you. Know that you are much more than the image reflecting back at you. Under that image, however you may choose to see it, live amazing things. Don't forget to open your eyes to those things, too.

You are not your body. You are a living, breathing, and beautiful soul.